Super Survivor Bros
by Setzertrancer
Summary: 36 Nintendo and other characters compete to survive to the end of a T.V. show run by the Master Hand. Each episode takes place in a different video game themed location. Silly but not random. Later on also becomes a mystery story.


**Super Survivor Bros**

Mysterious Voice: "Welcome to the 473rd Season of Survivor, the most overdone reality show on TV, but this time we are taking a whole new approach!"

Master hand reveals himself from the shadows, he is a white hand large enough to clench a car and is walking around on two fingers. Who knows where it's voice is coming from.

Master Hand: "That's right this time I, the great Master Hand is the host of this season of survivor and allow me to introduce the first ever cast of Nintendo characters, and some others, to at last be featured in a reality T.V. Show."

Master Hand: "Now allow me to introduce the cast they will be in four teams of nine and will compete for 3 amazing prizes. Number 1 is 1,000,000 of your game's currency such as coins or rupees. Number 2 is one wish of your choice granted by the legendary star rod, each of you disclosed a secret wish when you applied to be chosen for this show and only one of you will get to see it come true if you win. Please read the fine print on the application for exceptions to the wishes that can be granted. The final prize is a big twist that will be revealed when I see fit. Now allow me to introduce the **1****st**** Team**!"

Mario, Plumber

Next is Wario, Minigame Host

Diddy Kong, Monkey

Toon Link, Sailor\Adventurer

Ice Climbers, Mountain climbers

Metaknight, Galaxy Army Soldier

Wolf, Dogfighter

Jigglypuff, Pocket Monster

Captain Falcon, Racer

The **2****nd**** Team** consists of

Peach, Princess

Bowser, Koopa King

Kirby, Ball

Pokemon Trainer, Pokemon Trainer

Snake, Infiltrator

Donkey Kong, Gorilla

Ike, Mercenary

Ness, PSI wielder

Samus, Bounty Hunter

**Team 3** contains

Luigi, Plumber

Pit, Bodyguard

Link, Adventurer

Marth, Prince

Lucas, PSI wielder

Pikachu, Pocket Monster

King Dedede, King

Fox, Pilot

Mr. Game & Watch, Monochrome Hero

Last but not least **Team 4**

Zelda, Princess

Sonic, Hedgehog

Captain Olimar, Pikmin Trainer

Ganondorf, Evil Sorceror

Falco, Pilot

R.O.B, Robotic Operating Buddy

Yoshi, Dinosaur

Lucario, Pocket Monster

Conker, Squirrel

**Master Hand: **"Who will be the sole survivor?"

**Super Survivor Bros. Day 1-3, Delfino Plaza**

**(Ganondorf's audition tape)**

Ganondorf's face appears in the darkness, his eyes full of anger. He begins to speak. "I Ganondorf will be a great addition to survivor because I promise to use my evil magic to destroy all in my path for the million rupees, but of course my wish is more important, Muahaha! My Wish, Muahahahahaha! allow me to join this pointless game and I will be the most horrible person there, everyone will fear me and I will make it the most miserable experience I can for everyone involved. (End Tape)

Shigeru Miyamoto: "Well, you know he's got my vote, seeing as he's one of my favorite villains that I created and all".

Hardcore Gamer: "This guy sounds L33T, I agree we should totally have him in maybe he will actually be more challenging as a boss fight for once".

Fanfiction Reader: "Interesting concept for a character, good opportunity for character development, who knows maybe he could develop some humility and become a nice person in the end, I just hope he doesn't win".

Old Grumpy Granny: "Fine put him in I don't really care, I'm only doing this because my superannuation is running out".

**Day 1 (Delfino Plaza)**

Postcard: Delfino Plaza is a beautiful little town next to the ocean, we have large luxurious houses and many tourist attractions, like the legendary Shine Sprite above the waterfall and many others.

Master Hand: "Welcome Smash Bros to our first location Delfino Plaza, you will remain here for 3 days until Tribal Council after which you will all be transported to another mysterious location. You will each reside in a different area of the town and it is up to you to figure out where to find food and water until the reward challenge on day 2 and then the immunity challenge on day 3. Finally at the end of day 3 I will reveal a huge! Massive! Twist! That will be so huge it will hugely effect the way you play the rest of the game. Good luck and now I will teleport you to your starting positions".

**Team 1 (The Docks)**

Team 1 consisting of Mario, Wario, Diddy Kong, Toon Link, Ice Climbers, Metaknight, Wolf, Jigglypuff and Captain Falcon appears on a pier and looks around to see the ocean spreading out in every direction except the east which leads into town.

Toon Link: "Well, this is fortunate we won't have any trouble finding food here".

He noticed a school of fish in the water and began thinking about which of his items would be best for getting the fish out.

Mario: "What-a bout water, we can't-a drink-a this salty water".

Wolf: "No problem, I'm going to find some water in town surely someone will sell it".

Wario: "You're an idiot wolf, how are you going to buy water without any coins!"

Wario pointed to the top of a small house, on which some golden coins were floating and spinning stationary in the air as if by magic. Wolf's eyes went wide open in surprise.

Wolf: "Calm down Wario remember that I'm not familiar with this strange world, what technology makes those coins float there?"

Falcon and Jigglypuff turned their attention to this question as they weren't familiar with floating objects either. While the rest were still taking in their surroundings, which to everyone but Mario, Wario and Diddy looked strange.

Wario: "Are you kidding me objects float and move all the time, it's just their way of telling you they're collectible otherwise you'll think they're part of the scenery, it makes perfect sense. You're just an idiot wolf, I don't like you!"

Wolf: "The feeling is mutual so far, I didn't to anything to provoke this attitude from you Wario"!

Mario walked up to Wolf who was quite a lot taller then him a patted him on the shoulder.

Mario: "Don't-a take it-a personally wolf, Wario always talks-a like this"!

Wario grunted his annoyance and walked off in a random direction to be alone and start plotting his plans to win the game, without having to be nice to anyone. _If only Waluigi was here he thought, his only friend._

The Ice Climbers playfully found a flat piece of ground and began hitting a block of ice between each other, Popo was male and dressed in Blue Eskimo clothes and his girlfriend Nana was in Pink. This was a game they never got sick of and their relationship with each other is so powerful they can't bare to ever be more then ten feet away from each other. Wolf walked up to the wall of the house and used the rocket boosters in his shoes to jump on top of the roof, he collected the coins but soon realized the roof was on fire.

Wolf: Oh no, can anyone put this out?

Jigglypuff waddled up to the wall of the house and took a deep breath and then started blowing strong gusts of air at the fire which soon put it out.

Jigglypuff: Jiggly... Puff!"

Diddy: Jigglypuff?

Jigglypuff: Jiggly!"

Diddy: "Well this is going to be annoying, can you say anything else?"

Jigglypuff: "Puff"

Diddy: "I see why they call you Jigglypuff, or were your designers lazy and made your name the only word you can say?"

Jigglypuff: "Jiggly Puff... Puff"!

Diddy: "Maybe I can help you, can you say Diddy?"

Jigglypuff: "Jiggly"?

Diddy: "Not Jiggly, Diddy, say Diddy, Diiii-Diiii".

Jigglypuff: "Ji-Ji"

Diddy jumped up and clapped his feet and hands together.

Diddy: "Yay, Close, but maybe you really can only use sounds from your name, At least I know that you understand me".

Mario had walked up and caught the second half of their conversation about language, afterward he made his input.

Mario: Its-a the same with me I can't stop talking with-a Italian-a accent and since Im-a E rated by ESRB, I cant-a use-a bad words-a.

Diddy: "Neither can I, I wish our developers weren't such pansies"

Captain Falcon zoomed over in a flash with his falcon kick, stopping just half a foot short of Mario.

Falcon: "Don't complain!, the video game market needs to be available to all people, or many of us wouldn't exist and we wouldn't have fans still following us today from their childhood, Heeya! No need to thank me for my legendary wisdom, now I'm off".

Falcon started running off with a cool looking exit, but then stopped and realized he hadn't made up his mind about where to go next. Falcon stroked his chin and then shouted,

Falcon: "I'm going to use my amazing speed to scout the area, Heeyaa"!

Falcon started dashing around the city and found that it was deserted, there were no people or shops, yet there were coins floating around everywhere. Falcon decided these shiny items would be useful for something and began jumping and falcon kicking everywhere to collect them all.

Meanwhile Toon Link whose cell shading made him look like the most out of place character had pulled out his fishing rod and threw it's line into the water and sat back and waited... and waited. He eventually decided to have a close look at the fish and realized that they weren't being effected by his lure at all. Metaknight walked next to him and laughed.

Metaknight: "Ha ha! Have you figured it out yet?"

Toon Link: "Wha, no what's going on?"

Metaknight: "The thing with being in a different world is that the rules change, Here in the Mario world there is not one instance of anyone fishing, so the programmers of this game never gave the fish that behavior".

Toon Link: "Oh, well then how can I get to the fish?"

Metaknight: "Well they exist, so it's just a matter of physically grabbing them and luckily the water in this world doesn't kill you, so you can swim down to get them".

Toon Link: "Okay then, this is going to be hard to get used to".

Metaknight: "In each new world we appear in we'll need to ask one of us who live there about the rules, otherwise we could get killed by something we don't expect.

Toon Link: "Wow, thanks for the help Metaknight, I'll be sure to help you understand the rules of my world when we are there"

Metaknight walks off and starts practicing with his sword in the air.

Toon Link: Hey, I have a sword too, let's duel

Toon Link stands in front of Metaknight and draws his sword, Metaknight smiles.

Metaknight: "Onguard!"

**Team 2 (Town Square)**

Team 2 consisting of Peach, Bowser, Kirby, Pokemon Trainer, Snake, Donkey Kong, Ike, Ness and Samus finds themselves in what appears to be the center street of the town, houses line both sides of the street, including a particularly large building on the north side, likely being the town hall. In the center of the street there is a statue of the race that lives here, a tall plump being with a tiny palm tree growing out of their head.

Bowser takes a quick look at his surroundings and then jumps on the platform the statue is on and smashes it to pieces with a strong swipe of his claw. He stands on this elevated platform and begins stamping his foot, the sheer weight making the ground tremor.

Bowser: "All right listen lowly minions, I appoint my awesome self as the leader, since we all know there is no one better..."

Peach shouts out over bowser

Peach: "Bowser! Stop this no one thinks you're cool and we are not going to follow you as a leader, I'm the princess of an entire kingdom, I should be the leader, he! He!"

Peach's cute little chuckle made all the male characters blush.

Bowser: "Muahaha! You're wrong my wife, without Mario here there is no one who can defeat me, challenge my leadership if you dare!"

Peach: "I'm not your wife you ugly koopa, none of those attempted forced ceremonies concluded and I would never never marry you if you were the last being in the kingdom".

Bowser: "Aw shucks" (whispers) "don't embarrass me in front of my minions".

Ike walks next to Peach and breathes in her heavy but sweet perfume.

Ike: "I'd be a much greater suitor for you're ladyship, would I not?"

Bowser jumped down off the platform and landed next to Ike.

Bowser: "Graahhh! Don't you talk to my woman, I'll crush you!"

Peach raised her fists in anger and stormed off

Peach (angrily): "I'm not anybodies woman"

Ike: "You want a fight, you overgrown turtle"!

Bowser: "OVERGROWN TURTLE!!, That's it"

Bowser takes a massive swing with his claw towards Ike's face. Ike blocks it with his two handed sword and then whacks bowser in the stomach with it's hilt. Bowser topples over onto his stomach and begins weeping.

Bowser: Noooo! I though only Mario could beat me why!"

Ike: "Don't feel bad, trained for decades have I, I am not beaten easily".

Snake was looking around puzzled mostly by the strange appearance of all these characters around them they all appeared to be plucked straight out a cartoon. Kirby especially caught his attention and was walking towards him. It was just a pink sphere with eyes and mouth and tiny arms and feet with no fingers or toes.

Kirby: "Wow, hello you look... detailed".

Snake: "Yeah and you look like a three year old child drew you, what the hell are you".

Kirby: "My race was never given a name I was created when games had very limited graphics and my form has been updated very little".

Snake (laughing): "You look like a marshmallow, man I feel sorry for you, you're a freak".

Kirby: "That's not very nice, I'm happy with who I am and the abilities I've been given".

Snake: "Abilities like what, being used as a soccer ball?"

Kirby opened his mouth extremely wide to almost the size of his body and began to breathe in, causing a really strong vacuum of air. Snake before he even had a chance to escape was pulled inside Kirby's mouth. Snake was terrified all he could see all around him was pink. Next thing he know he was spit back out and into a house wall. Kirby now had a blue bandanna around his forehead and clothes that looked like a simplified version of Snake's.

Snake: "What the hell, you kind of look like me!"

Kirby pulled out a rocket launcher and aimed it at Snake.

Kirby: "My abilities allow me to swallow someone and steal their powers or weapons".

Snake: "Okay okay, I'm sorry I was mean, please don't shoot".

Kirby laughed and then spat out a star immediately causing Snake's clothes and rocket launcher to disappear.

Ness walked around checking the town out while doing walk the dog tricks with his yo-yo. Pokemon Trainer decided to join him on his walk to get to know him.

Ness: "Hi I'm Ness, what's your name?"

Pokemon Trainer: "Uh... Well I don't actually have one".

Ness (puzzled): "You don't have a name?"

Pokemon Trainer: "Nope you see my character was just randomly taken from a Pokemon game and chucked into this competition, My real name is Random Pokemon Trainer #423, according to the source code of my game, I'm one of many randomly generated characters the main character might fight at the battle tower".

Ness: "Wow, that's must be a burden, I never thought of what it might be like to be a random NPC in a game that no one notices".

Pokemon Trainer: "Yes it is a very sad and lonely experience, but now that I've been chosen for survivor I can finally become a real character with my own storyline and everything, I can feel myself becoming more complex every minute".

Ness: "Good for you, I hope it works out for you maybe one day you'll be important enough to have your own name, and even a game".

Pokemon Trainer: "Yes, that would be a dream come true"

Ness: "Huh, why do I sense that there are six other lifeforms with you"?

Pokemon Trainer: "Oh, those are my pokemon, I was allowed to bring them, since I don't actually have any abilities of my own, would you like to meet them, Squirtle! I choose you!"

Pokemon Trainer's pokeball opened up on the ground a revealed a blue turtle like animal.

Meanwhile Samus wondered around and saw Donkey Kong climbing up a tree trying to grab coconut.

Samus: "Hello there"

Donkey Kong was surprised that such a sweet feminine voice came from such a robotic looking creature, her suit was made entirely of metal, and completely hid any sign of gender.

Donkey Kong: "Food get, me get food for team"

Samus: "A talking Gorilla?"

Another strange thing Samus noticed was that this Gorilla was wearing a red tie.

DK: "Ooo!, Me talk well, me try hard"

Samus: "Well you do a good job, it definitely shows"

DK pulled a coconut off the tree and smashed it open on his forehead. It broke into two halves and DK handed one to Samus.

DK: "Me Donkey Kong, Me like you".

Samus took the coconut piece and you couldn't see it under her helmet but she was smiling.

**Team 3 (Lighthouse)**

Team 3 consisting of Luigi, Pit, Link, Marth, Lucas, Pikachu, King Dedede, Fox and Mr. Game + Watch appeared inside a building, it was very plain and had a stairwell leading up to a lighthouse, they were also next to the ocean but there were no piers.

Pikachu excitedly began exploring every inch of the structure with stunning speed.

Pikachu: Pika-pi!

Luigi: "Wow! that little guy can move fast".

Pit: "Ha ha! That looks fun, I wish I could do that".

Pit began flying and trying to catch the yellow blur as if he was trying to catch a butterfly.

Pit: "Slow down!, sit still for a just little minuticus"

Luigi: "minuticus?"

Pit gave up trying to catch the Pikachu who had climbed to the top of it and was enjoying the great view of the town and ocean.

Pit: "Huff, puff!, Oh I meant minute, it's a habit of mine"

Marth: "The time for silliness is over we need to start thinking about food and water and... well I guess we have shelter covered".

Pit: "We just got here oldie, it's the perfect time for fun".

Pit flew over Marth's head and began flying into spinning coins floating in mid air, he saw it as a game and laughed at how the coins strangely dissipated with a bling sound as soon as he touched them.

Fox: "Geez, guys you know what the Master Hand is like knowing him he has probably put traps or enemies around everywhere".

Fox carefully peeked out the door of the building with his gun at the ready and survey the area with his gun in one hand and his deflector in the other.

King Dedede: "If you read the contract you'll know that the only time this game could involve monsters is when we have challenges, which are stated as such. You are being paranoid Fox".

Fox: "I don't care what you think I don't trust that evil hand".

beep Blip bebeep

Fox: "What is that strange noise?"

Fox spun around with his gun and saw something very weird in the doorway it was some sort of 2D person shaped black thing in the doorway.

Fox (demanding): "What are you?, explain yourself"

Fox pointed his gun at the object and it soon moved but did so with an incredibly small amount of frames of animation. It practically only had about fifteen poses it could assume, but was also capable of morphing parts of it's body into any object it wanted.

Mr. Game and Watch made a flag appear in his hand and beeped a few times.

Fox lowered his gun

Fox: "Huh, what are you trying to tell me?"

Dedede: "That guy can't communicate he only consists of two sound effects and maybe 40 frames of animation he can assume?"

Fox: "Man, poor guy"

Dedede: "yeah, this is the fate of the earliest video game characters that are forgotten and never upgraded".

Fox: "Hey how do you know all this anyway?"

Dedede: "Unlike some people I actually read the character profiles before I came on this show".

Fox: "I can't believe I agreed to this, it's totally messed up"

Dedede: "You come from a world that makes a lot of sense don't you".

Fox: "Well, I, I dunno?"

Dedede: "Yeah you may find it hard to adjust to some of the worlds we will visit".

Fox: "There's more worlds, like this?"

Dedede: "Wow you really are ignorant, it's like you didn't even read the contract before you signed it".

Fox: "I, uh, shut up".

Dedede adjusted his heavy hammer on his shoulder and thought _that walking talking fox has got issues._ Game & Watch walked over to the beach using two frames of walking animation and then started making sausages appear off his frying pan, that appeared suddenly in his hand.

Lucas: "Wow! Did you see that this strange guy can make food spontaneously out of nowhere".

The rest of the smash bros gathered around and started trying to catch some of the sausages. Lucas used his psychic power to attract one to his hand and caught it

Lucas: "OW!, It's hot"

Lucas dropped it into the grass and watched it's unusual 2d paper like shape have equally unusual 2d smoke coming off it.

Link: "What did you expect?, it's a sausage that just came off a frying pan"

Link pulled a bottle of water out of his, uhh... somewhere and poured it over the hot sausage on the ground to cool it down. Link then picked it up and took a bite.

Link: "Gak!, not very nice it tastes like charcoal, but it's better then no food at all"

Link resumed eating the rest of the sausage.

Luigi: "Well we've got to keep this little guy, he's a limitless food supply".

Lucas: "I agree, he will give us a huge advantage over the other teams, here's to an immunity for our limitless food supply"

Game & Watch: Beeep Bip

Luigi: "Yep he seems to approve, anyone else got useful abilities, we would want to keep"

Pit (Shouting): "I CAN FLY, KEEP ME!"

Pit was flying high above them trying to chase down birds.

Link: "Now there's an ability I'm jealous of".

Marth: "Let's not do this, claim that some of us are more useful then others, it will inevitably lead to jealousy and tension".

Fox: "Fine, Mr. Sensible Let's Not Have any Fun!"

Marth: "Sigh, you are all immature kids, especially him".

Marth pointed up to Pit who was now trying to imitate the birds aerial maneuvers.

Pit: "Weeeeeeeheeeeee!"

Link: "I'm an immature kid, really"

Link demonstrated some complex maneuvers with his Master Sword.

Marth: "Are you challenging me"?

Link readied his shield. Pikachu stood between them and shook his head, not wanting a fight to break out.

Pikachu: Pikaaaa!

Link "Maybe I am, vanity is something I can't stand"

Marth: "As much as I would enjoy a duel, we have more important things to do".

Link laughed and put his sword and shield away.

Link: "If you say so".

Luigi jumped on top of a house to get a view of the rest of the town and he noticed that it was deserted, it seemed that the town had been completely cleared so that they would be here alone.

Lucas slung his pet snake over his shoulder and began to levitate into the air, after ten seconds he got on the roof of the house and joined Luigi in his observation.

Luigi: "I wonder what my brother is doing?"

**Team 4 (Waterfall)**

Team 4 consisting of Zelda, Sonic, Captain Olimar, Ganondorf, Falco, R.O.B., Yoshi, Lucario and Conker appeared facing a massive waterfall around which there was a huge 40 foot white stone arch with a huge Shine Sprite at the top.

R.O.B: Analysis complete, water dangerous for ROB's moving parts, solution found, avoid".

Sonic: "Looks like there'll be an awesome view from up there".

Falco: "You're not planning on..."

But before Falco had finished his sentence Sonic was on top of the arch above the shine sprite. From here the entire town looked like a tiny playground, it only consisted of about 5 intertwining streets, Sonic could also see the tiny moving specks that were the members of the other teams. One at the west pier, one at the south beach and one in the center of town, they were at the north end of town and the separation between the teams seemed about even. Sonic run back down the wall of the arch to share the information.

Ganondorf: "Okay, fools! You will bow down to me and follow my orders if you want to live".

Ganondorf held up his arm while laughing manically and a bright ball of energy bordered by dark purple started charging in his hand and growing in size.

Zelda: "No, Ganondorf, not this time".

Zelda pulled out a bow a pulled out an arrow that had a head that was so bright, it burned your eyes like the sun to look at it. She readied it on the bow.

Ganondorf: "What, no way?"

Zelda: "You know by now that if I hit you with this you'll lose all your power for ten seconds and in that time".

Ganondorf: "Dammit, but you normally only have that after Link has gone through eight dungeons and defeated all my minions".

Zelda: "Link, killed all your minions a week ago"

Ganondorf: "Oh yeah, well you just wait after I win this stupid game Hyrule will be mine".

Zelda: "You wished to rule Hyrule, didn't you?"

Ganondorf: "Ha ha! I won't keep it a secret I wished that I would rule the entire galaxy and that no one not even Link would be able to stop me, Muahahaha!"

Falco: "The entire galaxy, I don't think so I won't let someone like you anywhere near Corneria!"

Ganondorf: "If I win no one will be able to stop me, EVER!, MUAHAHAHA!".

Olimar: "I have to agree, one thing's for certain, I'm voting you out at my first opportunity"

The five Pikmin around Olimar nodded their approval.

Conker: "I did not have that really bad day, just so a fucking asshole like you can screw up my happy ending".

Everyone stared at Conker in shock with their mouths wide open.

Conker: "Shit, what the hell is everyone looking at, is it something I said"

Yoshi: "You said happy bunnies"

Conker: "Happy bunnies?, no I didn't"

Yoshi: "I can't say what you said because it's forbidden by my programming, whenever I swear a random positive word comes out, like you're a big pretty wonderful, son of a sunshine flowerbed"

Conker: "Ha ha ha ha! That is soooo gay!"

Yoshi: "I know I can never say how much I love someone, I mean adore someone, ahh you know what I'm trying to say right".

Conker: "How much you hate someone?"

Yoshi: "Yes that's the word, I love this freedom. Freedom!, even that word is forbidden to me, this is wonderful, no way!, sigh".

R.O.B: "(Explanation) I was made for kids so my vocabulary is also of limited quantity"

Olimar: "What did you just say before spoke?"

R.O.B: "(Clarification) Since I am incapable of expressing tone of voice or body language, my program has to describe my mood and tone of voice, before speaking."

Conker: "I am with a bunch of freaks, this'll be easy".

Lucario had been completely still and silent in meditation until he finally said something.

Lucario: "I will win this game, I have trained harder then all of you, it is not a matter of if, only when".

Sonic: "Ha! I've trained all my life to at last become the greatest video game mascot of all"

Olimar: "Was that your wish, Sonic?"

Sonic: "Yes, I wished to become a greater mascot then that annoyingly popular Mario, I mean he's a Plumber, come on why do people think a plumber is cool, I'm going to at last prove myself".

Falco had been closely observing Lucario and noticed something unusual.

Falco: "Lucario why is your skin made of steel or something?"

Lucario: "Yes I'm am naturally made of steel, meaning I am invincible to all physical attacks".

Falco: "Invincible, huh?"

Falco pulled out his blaster with blistering speed and shot a laser at Lucario. Just as the shot was about to hit him, he disappeared and Falco felt a hard metal fist hit him in the back.

Falco: "Ouch, ahhh! How?"

Lucario: "I am also quicker then I look, I am invincible".

Olimar: "It will take more then strength and speed to win this".

Sonic: "More then speed, ha ha I doubt it, speed is everything".

Just to show off Sonic ran back up to the top of the arch and waved.

Ganondorf: "My magic will vanquish you all".

Zelda pulled out her bow again.

Ganondorf: "So what you're just going to blackmail me for this entire game".

Zelda: "If that's what it takes".

Olimar: "and blackmail".

R.O.B: "(Suggestion) Resources must be gathered for survival".

Conker: "We are in a town, in survivor. Does anyone else think this is stupid".

Sonic: There is no one else in the entire town, so I'm assuming all the shop are emptied out, so yes we are going to need to find food to survive, I'M ON IT!

Sonic became a blur and disappeared. Conker sat down against a wall.

Conker: "At least this isn't as bad a rolling a giant ball of poo up a mountain of poo, you pussies have it easy in your games".

Yoshi: "That is delicious, I mean fun, Oh forget it!"

Sonic returned with an armful coconuts and bananas.

Sonic: "Now can MARIO DO THAT!, I don't think so".

And so our 36 survivors got to know each other and then went to sleep, but what could be waiting tomorrow when they receive their first reward challenge.

**Day 2**

**Team 1 (The Docks)**

Mario arrived at the town bulletin board and found 4 pieces of paper tacked to it, one for each team he assumed. Mario pulled off one of the papers and began reading it as he headed back to his team. 'A name your team now needs, but lame it may not be, or a reward waiting for you will not be'. Mario immediately had his own suggestion he was looking forward to trying it when he got back.

Mario: "Our first-a challenge is-a easy one"

Mario called out as soon as he could see his teammates.

Diddy excited tried to snatch the piece of paper off Mario but ripped it in half. Mario handed Diddy the second piece and he began to read to the rest of the team.

Diddy: "A name your team now needs, but lame it may nor be, or a reward waiting for you will not be"

Wario: "Urk, what they couldn't afford a decent poet for this dumb show".

Falcon: "Geez a monkey that can read, I tell you these fictional animals are ridiculous"

Ice Climbers: ICE BOTHERS!

Wolf: "Ice brothers, don't be stupid we should be called the Wolves"

Mario: "I vote-a Team Mario"

Jigglypuff: "JigglyPUFF!"

Toon Link: "Am I the only one who notices how selfish you're all being".

**Meanwhile at Team 2 (Town Square)**

Bowser: I DEMAND IT BE BOWSER'S MINIONS!

Bowser starts blowing fire threateningly, while stomping the ground in anger.

Ness: "This is stupid none of us have anything in common what name could be possibly all agree on"

Ike: "It should be a name in common with none of us".

Pokemon Trainer: "But that is boring".

Kirby: "So it should be a name none of us like?"

Ike: "No that's not what I meant"

Peach: "I know the perfect name!"

**Meanwhile in Team 3 (Lighthouse)**

Pikachu returned with the challenge paper after only ten seconds and Luigi quickly took it and cleared his throat.

Luigi: "Quiet, Quiet!, A name your team now needs, but lame it may not be, or a reward waiting for you will not be"

The smash bros muttered amongst themselves

Luigi: "A name, what's popular nowadays?"

Pikachu: "Pikachu!"

Luigi: "No Pikachu, I know it's the only thing you can say, but we need something for all of us"

Pikachu: "PIKA PIKA!"

Luigi: "NO Pikachu!"

Luigi looked up from the paper and realized that Pikachu was pointing up.

Luigi looked up and saw that Pit had written something in the air with a long ribbon.

Luigi: "Pit you're a genius!"

One by one the muttering Smashers realized Pit flying above them and all shouted their approval, except Marth.

Marth: "sigh, stupid name but whatever, it's not up to just me".

Loud Voice: NOOOOOOOOOO!! I HATE THAT NAME I HATE IT CHANGE IT, CHANGE IT NOOOOOOW!!

(The ground shook)

Marth: "What was that?"

Luigi: "I could have sworn that was Bowser's voice, he sounds really angry".

Fox: "Alright it's decided, let's get ready to meet the rest of the teams for the competition, I'll scout ahead and make sure it's safe".

Beep Bip Beep Bip Beep Bip Beep Bip

It was a noisy journey.

**Team 4 (Waterfall)**

Team 4 have already decided their name and are halfway to the meeting place

Yoshi: "Oh Conker, that's name is Brilliant, and I'm not smiling for once, ah that's not what I meant to say, I LOVE this!"

Falco: Where's Sonic?

Conker: "He said he'll stay behind and still beat us there, what a cocky bastard".

Olimar: "I like the colorful language you bring to the dialogue, it's refreshing".

Zelda: "Yeah I'm tired of being censored, This team name will help us vent our frustration".

R.O.B: "(Concern) Name not found in vocabulary, ROB won't be able to use it in conversation".

Lucario: "Nobody will, except Conker of course"

Ganondorf: "How do you think I feel, I'm a bad guy I won't even be able to say our team name, GRRAAAH!!"

Team four arrived at the Town Hall and went inside, three fourths of the seat were filled by the other teams and in their seating area Sonic was already waiting for them, he cockily yawned at them as they sat down. Master Hand was standing on a stage in from of them.

Master Hand: "Welcome to your very first challenge and also likely your easiest, so you better enjoy yourselves while you can because your next challenge will probably make you want to cry. Let's get into it, Team 1 please step onto the stage".

When they stood up they organized themselves into a particular order before walking on to the stage. It was left to right Captain Falcon followed by Diddy Kong, Metaknight, Wolf, Mario, Wario and Ice Climbers. Toon Link and Jigglypuff just stood behind everyone else.

Master Hand and everyone in the room gave them a strange look.

Master Hand: "Okay now if you're done with the performance I didn't ask for would you mind telling the judges your team name. Master Hand pointed out four people at the back of the room. Meet our panel Shigeru Miyamoto, Hardcore Gamer, Fanfiction Reader and Old Grumpy Granny. They will each be giving you a score out of ten, and the highest scoring name will win this lovely prize. Take it away Crazy Hand!"

Crazy Hand: "For a limited time only and only if your name makes us weep with pleasure, at absolutely no cost what so ever, walk away, tax free, no strings attached, better then a bargain, yours to keep..."

Master Hand: "Crazy Hand!, I don't have all day get to the point".

Crazy Hand: "It a Brand New!!, Outdoor Barbecue (food not included) and and an amazing real working Universal Translator from Star Trek, Are you tired of not being able to communicate with everyone in your team, well with this little beauty not only can you finally understand everything they say, but you can also understand everything they don't say... Oh wait that's not right".

Master Hand: "Okay thank you Crazy Hand, now you've had the screen time you paid me for so get lost".

Falcon: Are you ready to hear our name, Master Hand?"

Master Hand: "No I'm not you rude inferior character"

Master Hand jumped off the stages and grabbed the chair Pikachu was sitting on throwing him off".

Pikachu: "PIIII!"

Master hand took the chair and slouched in it like a slob.

Master Hand: "Now I'm ready to hear it, hurry up!"

Toon Link stood to the left of Falcon, so the crowd could see him.

Toon Link: "Our team name is..."

Toon Link nudged Falcon hard.

Falcon: "Capt".

Diddy: "Ong".

Metaknight: "Night".

Wolf: "Wolves".

Mario\Wario: "io".

Ice Climbers: "s".

Toon Link: "Captongnightwolvesios".

The Crowd starred in surprise and many of them started laughing. If Master Hand had a mouth that could droop open it would've.

Master Hand: "Are you kidding me, that's awful!"

Toon Link: "it was the only way we could all agree on a name, we had to all be a part of it. I didn't care to be honest".

Master Hand: "I swear if any more of you had a stupid idea like this I'm going end this show right now before it damages my reputation, Judges!, rate this pile of waste!"

Shigeru Miyamoto: "Horrible, Terrible, I am ashamed to call you all my creative children, you have really let me down, one out of ten!"

Hardcore Gamer: "There are more creative names then that in Line Runner, because there are none, shameful, two out of ten".

Master Hand: "Two votes and only three points, I hope you all feel really bad".

Fanfiction Reader: "I just wrote it down, and it looks as bad as it sounds, one out of ten".

Grumpy Old Granny: I like word puzzles, nine out of ten.

Master Hand: "nine out of ten, are you stupid, you're fired!"

Crazy Hand Grabs Grumpy Old Granny and throws her outside.

Master Hand: "From now on I'm taking over Grumpy Old Granny's vote, so here we go, an abysmal one out of ten, for a total of 5, now sit down and wear that horrible name forever as a badge of shame!"

The Captongnightwolvesios stormed of the stage and sat back in their chairs.

Wario: "Ha! I'd like to see them come up with something better".

Master Hand: "What are you waiting for Team 2 get on the damn stage"!

Team 2 walked quickly the stage and Peach stood up the front as the spokesperson for the group, Bowser was moving around restlessly and glared at peach with fuming anger.

Peach: "We almost had the same problem as team one, but he, he. We found something that eight out of nine of us had in common".

Bowser: "Grahhhhh! I hate you Peach, just as much as I hate Mario, this is your last chance!"

Bowser began stomping the ground so hard the whole room shook.

Peach: "We will now call ourselves the KoopaKrushers, because of our common dislike of Bowser, he he".

Bowser: "I will DESTROY you all!"

Master Hand: "KoopaKrushers, meh, at least it makes some sense three out of ten, there your guaranteed to beat the awful team before you, Judges!"

Shigeru Miyamoto: I can't help but love Bowser just as much all my children, I don't really like the violence reference associated with the name so, four out of ten.

Hardcore Gamer: "Reminds me of the good old days when I would jump on the Koopas in Super Smash Bros and jumping on the axe to make bowser fall to his doom, ahh so satisfying, eight out of ten".

Fanfiction Reader: "Why did you spell Crushers with a K, that's wrong".

Peach: "It's meant to be spelled like that so that it becomes KK when in initials".

Fanfiction Reader: "Sorry, I don't believe there is any excuse for bad spelling three out of ten!"

Peach: "Master Hand, surely, that's not fair".

Master Hand: "Sorry but they make the rules, unless they don't vote the way I want them to, so you got a total of 18, good luck winning with that you'll need it."

The KooperKrushers return to their seats and Bowser storms outside in anger. He makes a lot of noise as he bashes what's left of the statue's platform into pieces.

Master Hand: "I'm getting bored, Team 3!"

Team 3 walks onto the stage in no particular order, but Pit is flying and is holding a long white ribbon.

Luigi: "Our team name was the sole idea of Pit, so we will allow him to spell it out for you".

Pit readies himself and then flies with surprising speed to make a word with the ribbon.

'L33Ters'

Master Hand: "Not Bad, Popular culture reference, everyone likes those, but awful presentation, five out of ten"

Dedede: "We were never told the presentation had anything to do with it"

Master Hand: "So, shut up it does now, Judges!"

Shigeru Miyamoto: "That gaming word, is the spawn of some evil console other then Nintendo, I don't like it, only we do anything original, four out of ten".

Hardcore Gamer: N00Bz, that is teh 1337est nam3 3va, t3n out 0f t3n!!1one"

Fanfiction Reader: "Do you have any idea how annoying these strange new languages are to read? You're only getting a five out of ten from me"

Master Hand: "You are winning on 24 points, yay this boring activity is nearly over with only one team to go, Team 4 I Summon Thee".

The L33Ters headed down to their chairs as Team 4 approached the stage.

Master Hand: "Hurry up!"

Team 4 stood on the stage with Conker and Yoshi at the front of the stage.

Yoshi: "Our team name brings with it a special message, to all the video game characters that are never able to lovingly,"

Conker (Over Yoshi): "Fucking!"

Yoshi: "Say what we really mean because of our great freedom of love".

Conker (Over Yoshi): "Lack of free speech".

Yoshi: "due to video game developers and other excited burly gentlemen".

Conker (Over Yoshi): "Whiny Old Hags".

Yoshi: "We are all happy to speak like children".

Conker (Over Yoshi): "Coerced".

Yoshi: "So now as the only 'M' rated character in our team Conker will now say our proud team name".

Conker: "The Fucking Bastards!"

The other teams gasped and muttered amongst themselves.

Master Hand: "How dare you, I hate swear words, do you ever hear me using them, two out of ten, Judges!"

Shigeru Miyamoto: "This is meant to be a family show, could this turn into a show full of drugs, sex and alcohol just because of the introduction of one adult character, I can't allow this to happen two out of ten!"

Hardcore Gamer: Fuck all them emotionally unstable low self esteem, assholes out there, SHIT YEAH!! Ten out of Ten!"

Fanfiction Reader: "Swear words in fiction are just an excuse for a lack of creativity, I do not approve, two out of ten".

Master Hand: "That totals 16 congratulations, you may hang your head in shame to the L33Ters".

Conker: "You Fucking cock munching Pussies!"

Yoshi: "Yeah, what he said!"

The L33Ters stand up and begin hugging each other in celebration.

Luigi: "We won, the Barbecue is ours"

Lucas: "Yeah we have both a sausage machine and a Barbecue, PWNED!1"

Pikachu: "Pika Pika Pi"

Link: "Oh yeah with the translator we will probably be able to understand Pikachu now"

Game & Watch: Beep Beep

Pit: "And maybe Mr. Game and Watchicus as well"

Fox: "Idiots, this won't make us any safer"

Marth: "Even I think you are overly paranoid and I'm a defender of my kingdom"

Pit: "Last back to camp is a rotten eggicus!"

Master Hand: "Ok GTFO, I've hand exercises to do tonight I don't want to be disturbed, See you all on day 3".

**Captongnightwolvesios (The Docks)**

Wolf: "Ah, what a shame it would have been really good to be able to cook this fish, it's not very nice raw".

Wolf used his strong teeth to crunch the fish, bone and all.

Mario: "I-a can heat-a it up for you with-a my fireball".

Wolf: "Oh yeah, silly me, thanks Mario".

Jigglypuff: "Puff! Puff! Puff! Puff!"

Ice Climbers: "What's wrong with Jigglypuff?"

Diddy: "I think she's annoyed that no one will ever understand her now".

Ice Climbers: "Oh yeah tough break".

Toon Link: "I bet those L33Ters are really enjoying that translator".

**L33Ters (Lighthouse)**

Luigi is holding the translator that is glowing with a whole variety of colored flashing lights.

Luigi: "Why won't this thing work?"

Pikachu: "Pika!"

Luigi: "I know Pikachu I'm trying".

Link: "Let me have a look at that, I'm good with items".

Link holds the translator and studies it for a moment and throws it back to Luigi.

Link: "Heck if I'd know"

Dedede: "Well this is unfortunate, winning an item that doesn't work, wait Fox would know, FOX!".

Fox walks over and takes the translator from Luigi.

Fox: "This is a very sophisticated piece of equipment, very sophisticated indeed".

Fox runs up to the beach and throws the translator into the water.

Pit: "No!, Fox what are you doing"

Fox: "It's a tracking device!"

Pit: "It is not"

Pit flies over the water to try and save the translator.

**KoopaKrushers (Town Square)**

Bowser sits alone in the next street while hearing the KooperKrushers, that he doesn't consider himself a part of, laughing and enjoying each others company around a camp fire.

Bowser: "Sniff Why are they such bullies to me, what did I ever do to deserve such mean treatment?, Sob".

Ike: "Bowser is crying back there, I never pictured him to be the first one to spill tears".

Peach: "Bowser is a coward, without all his koopa minions around him he is just a big baby".

Samus: "It doesn't sound like you like him very much".

Peach: "Of course not, would you like someone who kidnaps you and lock you up every single year".

Samus: "Maybe he just likes you"

Peach: "pft! I know that, but no matter how much I reject him he never gets the hint".

Suddenly Samus gets punched hard in the back.

DK: "Donkey Kong like Peach, protect Peach from strange girl sound robot".

Samus: "Ah! Why Donkey Kong".

DK: "Donkey Kong fight Samus for Peach".

Peach: "I hate this get away from me all of you".

Snake walked pass Peach unaware of what just transpired.

Snake: "Hey Peach cheeks, want a cigarette?"

Peach slapped snake in face the and ran off to be alone.

**Fucking Bastards (Waterfall)**

Sonic: "Yeah, 0.21 seconds a new record".

Sonic looked over the town from his favorite vantage point on top of the arch.

Olimar practiced throwing his Pikmin as far as he could over the river running through the town from the waterfall.

Lucario: "Good, everyone, train hard, no pain no winning tomorrows challenge, we need immunity keep it up".

Ganondorf: "If you think I'm doing anything you say, think again".

Zelda pulls out her bow.

Ganondorf: "Oh come on leave me alone!"

Zelda: "Nope do the one hundred push ups like Lucario asked".

Ganondorf drops to the ground and starts grunting.

Ganondorf: "What does this have to do my my magic power?"

Zelda: "Magic isn't everything".

R.O.B: "(Informational) Some beings are too bound by the real laws of physics to be in possession of supernatural powers".

Zelda: "Exactly like what happens when I shoot you with this arrow".

Ganondorf (sarcasm): "Yeah because there's so many other way I could lose my powers, sheesh!"

Ganondorf (muttering): "I will have my revenge".

**Day 3 (Delfino Plaza)**

**Fucking Bastards (Waterfall)**

The Fucking Bastards with the exception of Zelda watched the glowing green orb that floated six feet above the ground with awe and anticipation, Ganondorf was unimpressed by this passive magic.

Sonic: "I hope it will be a race".

Falco: "Yeah except you forgot that only you can run super fast".

Sonic: "So, I can be the whole team".

Olimar: "Sonic, You need to learn more about teamwork".

Sonic: "Oh you mean like Tails".

Olimar: "No I mean you can team up with people other then Tails".

Sonic: "You're joking right".

The Green Sphere made a big bright flash and Zelda appeared hold a new piece of paper in her hand.

Zelda: "Here it is, 'Get ready to fight, but there is a twist, prepare for the unexpected'".

Yoshi: Some needs to give that poet a merit badge for Wonderful!"

Conker (Over Yoshi): "Lame!"

Yoshi: "Thanks".

Conker: "We think alike".

**L33Ters (Lighthouse)**

Dedede: "A Twist how exciting".

Link: "But is it a good or bad twist, knowing Master Hand".

Lucas: "Bad twist".

Luigi tries to press buttons on a now unlit translator.

Luigi: "Why won't this thing work?"

Pit: "Probably because Fox chucked it in the ocean, would be my guess".

Fox: "I told you it was a spying device by the Master Hand".

Pit: "Who cares if it was, Master Hand is watching us anyway, don't you remember the cameras".

Fox: "Cameras?"

Pit: "Yes there are cameras everywhere because we are on a T.V. Show".

Fox: "I was never told about any Cameras".

Dedede: "The contract, fox".

Fox: "Oh, yeah".

Dedede whispers to Pit and Luigi: "I'm going to vote Fox out if I get a chance".

Pit and Luigi gave Dedede a subtle nod.

**KoopaKrushers (Town center)**

On a beautiful sunny day the KoopaKrushers are relaxing on the warm concrete plaza.

Ness: "Oh great, it's time to go all the way to the Town Hall, good thing it's only 10 meters away".

Ike: "That's still too far, I just want to stay here forever".

Snake inhales a cigarette.

Snake: "Ah! Such fresh morning air".

Kirby: "Those are going to kill you".

Snake: "Oh don't you start".

Peach: "Ok it's time to go inside everyone".

Ness: "Who made you the leader?"

Peach: "Fine stay out here, let the team down".

Ness: "Stupid emotional blackmail".

Ness dragged himself to his feet and entered the Town Hall along with everyone else.

**Captongnightwolvesios (The Docks)**

The Captongnightwolvesios were walking towards the center of town.

Falcon: "So I said if you can beat me in race, I'll give you my hat to eat".

Toon Link (Sarcasm): "Ha ha, you're so funny".

Falcon: "I know, I'm just one of those people, I've got the looks, I've got the skill, I've even got the killer jokes".

Toon Link: (sarcasm): "Yep killer jokes".

Falcon: "It's hard you know when everyone wishes they were you".

Toon Link (boredom): "uh huh".

Wario: "We're nearly there, don't any of you screw up and ruin my chance of winning this game".

Wolf: "Statements like that are what will likely lose you the game".

Metaknight: "You do realize people vote off the person they least like. That's you Wario, for me".

Wario: "I'm too much a genius dabble in stupid politics"

Jigglypuff: "Jiggly jiggly?"

Toon Link: "I wish I could understand you little buddy, I bet you're a lot more interesting then that Captain Falcon".

**(Town Hall)**

Master Hand: "Yeah you're back and I have a challenge for you, but you won't be competing against the other teams, you will be competing against your own teammates that you just went to all the trouble to get to know. Aren't I nice".

Mario: "Amongst-a ourselves?"

Master Hand: "That's right each team will go out there and only one member will return undefeated, those remaining characters must then choose someone from their own team to eliminate. Meaning that four characters will be eliminated before the next three days. There are too many of you and I don't want to do this forever after I've earned the amount of money I want. So Team Reallystupidlamenameios, you are first. I want you to run as far apart from each other for 30 seconds and then it's everything goes until the last survivor walks back through that door. Now get lost".

The Captongnightwolvesios ran out of the Town hall and each run in a completely different direction.

The first run into each other is Mario and Ice Climbers.

Mario: "I'm-a sorry"

Mario shoots a fireball towards Popo but it is blocked with an ice chip hit towards him by Popo, after the first ice chip melts a second one hit by Nana goes after Mario. Mario runs toward it and pulls his cape around just in time to reflect it back at Popo knocking him unconscious. Mario runs off to find his next opponent and soon finds Toon Link with his bow already aimed at him, Mario doesn't get a chance to react before an arrow pierces him in his big gut. Toon Link walks through the Town Center with his bow drawn, every movement or sound he aims his ready bow at. Then directly down the street he sees Metaknight approaching him front of him. Toon Link lowers his bow.

Toon Link: "Metaknight, I didn't want to have to do this with you".

Metaknight: "Get out your sword, let's do this honorably".

Toon Link nods and gets out his sword and shield, and puts his bow away, somewhere. Metaknight lunges at Toon Link with the tip his sword in front of him and Toon Link easily blocks it with his shield. There is the distant sound of a motorbike. Toon Link does a spin attack and just before it makes contact with Metaknight he pulls up his cape and disappears. Metaknight reappears behind Toon Link and all of a sudden the next thing he sees is a wheel running over his head. Wario laughs as he runs over Metaknight and then Toon Link so fast they are unconscious before they even know what hit them.

Falcon grabs Jigglypuff in the air and Raptor boosts her into the air, he grabs her again, and again, and again until at last Jigglypuff closes her eyes. Falcon looks down and panics when he realizes that he rode Jigglypuff so high that it is nearly 60 feet back down to the ground.

Falcon: "Whoops, I got carried away, my abilities are just too awesome, this is going to hurt".

Falcon begins to fall very fast.

Diddy Kong is on his Rocket Barrels and is flying in circles around Wolf. Diddy fires peanut after peanut at Wolf that he keeps dodging with surprising finesse. Wolf keeps on trying to take shots at Diddy when ever he gets a chance but Diddy just laughs and dodges his shots with ease. Wolf decides to stop dodging and stands directly in front of a large barrage of six peanuts. At the last moment he presses a device on his belt, causes causing a force field to form around him. The peanuts hit the field and rocket back at Diddy at twice the speed, he dodges most of them but the the sixth hits him in the head and he goes down.

Wolf then sees Wario drive up to him and brake at the last moment kicking rocks and dirt into his face.

Wario: "Har har!, when I win you're outta here Wolf".

Wolf: "I can make you the same promise".

Wario: "You don't stand a chance"

Wario kicks his bike away and then takes a swipe at Wolf.

Wolf starts shooting his gun at Wario and he dodges toward Wolf and spins into the air catching him in a corkscrew attack.

Wolf: "I'm not out yet".

Wolf lunges at Wario and kicks him in the face.

Wario: "Gah! No more games I've been saving this up all week".

Wolf: "Saving what up"!

Wario: "THIS!"

**(Town Hall)**

Master Hand: "I'm going to take a wild guess and say that it is just about over".

**KAAAAAAAABOOOOOOOM** (The entire town hall shakes and things fall off the shelves)

Several smashers gather at the door and take a look outside. A huge brown mushroom cloud blocks out the view of the entire waterfall and Wolf is seen inside the cloud vomiting his guts out.

Luigi: "Oh no! GAS MASKS WE NEED GAS MASKS!!"

Kirby: "What is it?"

Luigi: "It's Wario, he farted".

Wario walked into the town hall and shouted.

Wario: "Wolf, get rid of Wolf, I won so get rid of Wolf".

Master Hand: "Wait a minute Wario you can have your vote after the rest of the teams have battled".

The KoopaKrushers ran outside and soon began their battle.

Pokemon Trainer got his Charizard out of it's pokeball and began riding on it's back. Charizard flew over the town and found his first target, Donkey Kong was running on his fists looking for a fight on the street below.

Pokemon Trainer: "Flamethrower".

Charizard flew over Donkey Kong and spewed out a long line of fire that enveloped him. But just before DK doubled over in pain he punched Charizard hard in the gut and Pokemon Trainer returned it to his pokeball.

Pokemon Trainer: "One down, five left".

Pokemon Trainer summoned Ivysaur and soon found Ness running around the corner.

Pokemon Trainer: "Solarbeam".

Ness saw Pokemon Trainer's Ivysaur charging up an attack at him but it was still far away so Ness used his best long range attack.

Ness: "PK Thunder".

Ness stood in place while he directed a small ball of electricity towards Ivysaur. Ivysaur finished charging and shot a massive laser of focused sunlight at Ness, wiping him out instantly. The electric ball was still going and soon hit Ivysaur in the head, nearly depleting all it's strength. Pokemon Trainer called back his Ivysaur and called out Squirtle.

Pokemon Trainer: "two down, four left, I'm untouchable"

Pokemon Trainer arrived at The Docks and saw Princess Peach running toward him with a golf club.

Pokemon Trainer: "Squirtle attack!"

Squirtle ran towards Peach but she jumped over it and ignored it.

Peach: "Do you think I'm stupid".

Peach ran up to Pokemon Trainer and hit him with the golf club.

Pokemon Trainer: "Nooo! You found my weakness"

Suddenly Peach got a bullet through her head and slumped to the ground before she could even think about what happened. On the top of the Town Hall Snake pumped his arm in triumph, and looked for his next target through the scope of his sniper rifle, he found Ike and shot him, then he found Kirby and shot him, then something large covered up his scope. He looked up and saw Samus standing over him, with her gun arm pointed at him. The last thing Snake saw was a missile between his eyes. Samus jumped down from the roof and saw Bowser charging at her. She shot another missile at him, but then Bowser jumped over it and landed on her with his butt crushing her under his enormous weight.

The L33Ters headed out next.

Luigi was walking along still trying to work the translator, some of it's flashing lights were now working.

Luigi: "Why won't this thing work?"

Dedede saw that he was distracted and sneaked up behind him. Dedede took a big swing with his hammer to the back of his head. Luigi tripped over a rock and Dedede tumbled over him landing flat on his stomach. Luigi then jumped on Dedede as he continued on his way knocking him out, still playing around with the translator.

Pikachu continuously quick attacked in a zig-zag in order to throw off his opponents and soon found Lucas and Fox fighting on a roof top. Fox started firing a continuous stream of lasers from his gun, which were hitting Lucas and hurting a bit but not causing him to flinch at at all.

Fox: "Ha ha, I could do this all day".

Lucas summoned a forcefield and began absorbing the energy from the lasers and regaining his life.

Lucas: "I could do this all day".

Pikachu quick attacked between them and summoned a lightingbolt from the sky which pikachu hit himself with witch caused an explosion of electricity to envelope both of them, sending them flying in both directions.

Pikachu: "PIKA!"

Pikachu made a little victory dance and set off after his next target.

Link drew his sword and charged as soon as he saw Marth. Link enjoyed proving himself against other sword users. Marth was ready for him and a loud clang echoed through the town as their swords met. Pikachu quick attacked in between them and once again summoned a lightning bolt. This time Link and Pikachu both went flying after Marth countered Pikachu's attack and hit him back twice as hard. Marth ran off to find his next target.

Pit was flying high above the town to stay out of reach, he planned to stay there until he only had one opponent left. But he could see Luigi walking along distracted with the translator. _'This'll be an easy knockout'_ Thought Pit and he swooped down at Luigi with full speed. Luigi could see Mr Game & Watch ahead of him, so he put the translator in his pocket and stopped, so he could start charging up his green missile attack at Mr Game & Watch. Pit laughed when Luigi suddenly stood still _'Could he make himself any easier of a target'_ he thought and picked up even more speed, he could hear a whistle as his wings started cutting through the air with extreme speed. Luigi shot towards Mr Game & Watch and knocked him flying, while Pit suddenly flying face first toward the ground tried to swerve up, but it was too late. Pit hit the ground so hard he created a crater that matched the shape of his body. Luigi went back to trying to figure out the translator.

Marth was hiding down an alleyway when Luigi walked pass. Marth sneaked up behind Luigi and thrust his sword towards his back. Luigi saw a sword point appear out the front of his chest and then a second later fell asleep, the scene surprisingly lacked any gore. Marth had won.

The Fucking Bastards spread out and Zelda immediately began hunting down Ganondorf, she was determined to get him out of the show for the sake of Hyrule. While Sonic simply ran laps around the entire town in an effort to wait it out.

Olimar got his army of Pikmin ready and set out for opponents, he first encountered Lucario and remembering he was made of steel ordered two yellow Pikmin to attack him. Lucario punched one of them and got severely electrocuted. The second Pikmin tackled him and shocked him until he passed out. Olimar replenished his army and looked for another opponent and soon found Yoshi skipping and singing. Olimar stood back and got all his Pikmin to attack Yoshi. Yoshi allowed all of them to get close and swallowed each one creating six eggs that started following him.

Yoshi: "Thanks, these will be useful"

Olimar began to run for it, but Yoshi threw one of his eggs at a surprising range and knocked him out.

Conker had changed his appearance to suit being in battle, he wielded two uzis and wore a bullet proof vest and an army helmet. He was also smoking a huge cigar. The first character he encountered was Zelda.

Zelda: "Please Conker you must help me at least make sure Ganondorf doesn't win, then I'll let you defeat me".

Conker cocked his guns and aimed them at Zelda's head.

Zelda: "Please Conker!"

Conker: "Goodbye Motherfucker!"

Conker emptied two entire clips on Zelda's face, her brain entrails decorating the nearby trees.

Conker then walked up to her headless body and after reloading his gun emptied another two clips all over the rest of her body. Causing a variety of different colored organs to come flying out her stomach.

Conker: "Sorry bitch, I wanted to see what your entrails looked like".

Falco watched the entire spectacle and charged at Conker disgusted.

Falco: "You are one hell of an evil squirrel, I can't let you do this anymore".

Conker tried to shoot at Falco but realized he was out of ammo. Conker quickly pulled out another clip and started reloading but it was too late. Falco walked up to Conker and put his gun at his temple.

Conker: "Uh... wait in Zelda's last word she asked me to make sure Ganondorf doesn't win, please help me beat him".

Falco: "I don't think so"

Falco shot a laser through Conker's head that exploded in a fountain of gore.

Falco: "Gah! Disgusting gorey game characters".

Ganondorf: "Muahahahaha! That was delightful"

Ganondorf stood in front of Falco with a large glowing purple and yellow orb on his hand.

Ganondorf fired a dark energy bolt at Falco. But Falco refelcted it back at Ganondorf with his reflector. Ganondorf held up his cape and bounced it back, Falco barely reacted in time and bounced it back. Ganondorf hit it back at Falco and this time it moved too fast for Falco to stop and it smashed him into a nearby house.

R.O.B was the next to enter the scene and started flailing his arms wildly at Ganondorf. Ganondorf simply levitated into the air and out of it's reach. R.O.B fired a laser out of his eyes at Ganondorf and he easily dodged it.

Ganondorf: "Muahaha! What and entertaining little piece of junk you are".

R.O.B: "(Analysis) Junk, a worthless object, tone of voice suggests intention as an insult, appropriate for retaliation".

Ganondorf: " Muahahaha! I will destroy y.."

Ganondorf fell out of the air and hit the ground after getting hit in the head by an exploding egg. Yoshi now faced R.O.B. But suddenly a blue blur zoomed past and R.O.B was trampled by footprints all over it.

R.O.B: "(Diagnosis) Movement processors failing, shutting down for auto-repair".

Sonic stopped and started huffing and puffing.

Sonic: "Did I do it, did I outlast everyone".

Yoshi: "Nope you've still got me"

Sonic smiled.

Sonic: "Oh good, I thought I would be up against someone challenging, prepare to be defeated".

Sonic started running around and around Yoshi at such a speed the he only looked like a faint blue blur. Yoshi after getting over his disorientation ducked down and stuck his tongue out. Sonic tripped over it and due to his momentum launched himself directly into the Shine Sprite above the waterfall.

Gong

(Town Hall)

Master Hand: "So the winners of each team are Wario, Bowser, Marth and Yoshi, who would've thought such weaklings would have had the luck to come out on top".

Bowser: "Gah, how dare you I won because I'm awesome and everyone else is weak".

Master Hand: "So Wario, who do you want to kick out of your team".

Wario: "I already told you, Wolf!"

Master Hand: "Okay Wolf please, get lost there is a boat waiting for you at the Docks, If you think I'm going to waste my energy teleporting a big fat loser like you, you're mistaken".

Wario (shouting): "Don't let you're ass hit the door on the way out, I'd feel sorry for the door!"

Wolf walked out of the Town Hall really demoralized that he was the first to leave.

Mario: "Wario that was-a mean".

Wario: "You're lucky it wasn't you Mario, I was tempted".

Master Hand: "Okay Bowser you're next, do us a favor and pick the biggest loser".

Peach: "In that case Bowser you better pick yourself".

Bowser: "Graaahh! I will forgive that statement because you're my wife, no one unfairly beats me up and gets away with it Ike!".

Ike walked out with confidence.

Ike: "This bothers me not, I have greater callings in my life".

Master Hand: "Marth, hurry up or I'll make you leave".

Marth: "I don't like kids, please get rid of Lucas".

Lucas: "Wait, but don't you find Pit a lot more immature".

Pit: "I resent that I am never immature".

Master Hand: "Too late for anybody to change their minds, Lucas get out now, anyone who cries will join him!"

Lucas slung his snake over his shoulder and levitated out the door.

Master Hand: "Okay, Yoshi let's get this over with"

Yoshi: "I would like to..."

Conker: "Wait, I need to have a quick word with Yoshi"

Master Hand: "Fine, make it quick!"

Zelda: "Hey this isn't fair Conker's going to sway Yoshi's vote."

Master Hand: "so".

Zelda: "Please Yoshi you have to vote Ganondorf out!"

Conker gets on the stage and whispers to Yoshi.

Yoshi: "I will vote out who I want, Lovely!"

Conker (Over Yoshi): "Bitch!"

Zelda: "Hey!"

Conker points at Yoshi

Conker: "Hey he said it not me"

Master Hand: "Enough, times up Yoshi"

Yoshi: "Okay I'm getting rid of Falco".

Falco stands up and angrily points at Conker.

Falco: "I HATE YOU CONKER!"

Yoshi: "I was going to vote for you all along, wasn't I Conker".

Conker: "Absolutely, our conversation was about something completely different".

Fox: "Oh man I'm the only member of Starfox left, I have to make it to the end, for them".

Falco storms out furious.

Master Hand: "Okay that wraps up the challenge, now when you all go to sleep at your usual location tonight you will all wake up at your next destination for the next three days. But before I let you all go there is a huge massive twist I've been dying to spill, CRAZY HAND!".

Crazy Hand: "That's right this twist is so deliciously big and it will effect the rest of the game, never again will you see your teammates in the same way, because one of you somewhere is the MOLE!"

Master Hand: "Thanks Crazy Hand, now go home"

Dedede: "The Mole?"

Master Hand: "One of your fellow smash bros has been hired by us to try and sabotage challenges and deliberately cause social tension that will make for an entertaining show, The Mole is guaranteed to stay in the show until the final three and only when the winner is revealed will the Mole be revealed, hopefully this new information will make you all want to kill each other in suspicion".

Zelda points accusingly at Conker.

Zelda: "He's the Mole, I know it!"

Conker: "Oh come on!"

Master Hand: "That's what I like to see, Now get back to your camps and save all your drama until tomorrow morning".

The Captongnightwolvesios, KoopaKrushers, L33Ters and Fucking Bastards all head back to The Docks, Town Center, Lighthouse and Waterfall, with no idea where they will wake up to in the morning. The Credits Roll.

Wolf stands in front of the camera looking sad.

Wolf: "This is really unfortunate, here I was trying to be a better person then I normally am and this is how I get rewarded, I highly doubt the winner of this show will deserve it, goodbye and good riddance".

Ike stands proud and tall.

Ike: "I'm not fussed at all about this, I was actually contemplating quitting, simply because I felt this was a waste of my time, miss being here I will not".

Lucas pets his snake.

Lucas: "The only people I feel sorry for are those who will never get to really know me, I suppose I probably should have tried to make a better first impression. Unfortunately however it takes me a while to open up, oh well bye".

Falco shakes his fist in anger.

Falco: "That Conker, he didn't even win and yet he manipulated Yoshi into voting me out, I feel sorry for poor Yoshi being used by that horrible character to further his own ends, next time I see Conker on the outside I swear I'm going to teach him a lesson".

Next Time on Super Survivor Bros.

Postcard of World 1: World 1 from the original Super Mario Bros. is a wonderful example of perfect 2D level design Stage 1 is a simple grassy level populated by Goombas and useful item blocks. Stage 2 is a dark eerie underground sewer, with many endless pits. Stage 3 is on the top of tall mushroom and moving platforms and Stage 4 is one of bowser's many castles.


End file.
